A new buzzword is taking off in China.
It started to emerge on social media feeds in late December, with young people sharing moments of enjoyment while eating alone — with a bowl of instant noodles, a slice of cake, a bubble tea from a street stall, or a plate of dumplings eaten at home.
The captions read like love notes. But there’s only one person involved, posting to themselves with the phrase: 爱你老己.
Translated directly, it means “love you” (爱你), “dear” (老) “me” (己).
After some discussion, we decided to translate this as “kudos to me”.
Like so many internet slang phrases, this one is adapted from online gaming slang. It started out as a famous line from the character, Sett, in League of Legends (英雄联盟):
“Love you, mom, see you tomorrow” (爱你老妈，明天见).
It evolved into a playful sign-off between players in the game.
The phrase first started to go viral in late November, in a video of a content creator peeling a pomelo (柚子) saying:
“I said I wanted to eat the pomelo but couldn’t be bothered to peel it.
After hearing that, I immediately peeled it and gave it to myself.
Kudos to me, and see you tomorrow.”
我说想吃柚子但不想剥，我自己听完马上给自己剥好送给自己了，爱你老己，明天见。
Since then, the phrase has taken off in a big way.
Within one month, topics related to “kudos to me, see you tomorrow” (爱你老己，明天见), and the shorter four-character version (爱你老己), accumulated well over 400 million views across Douyin, RedNote, and Kuaishou.
One internet user perfectly summarises the spirit of the phrase:
“My dear self is the only person who smiles as they spend money on me.
And the only person I know who, if 100 yuan is all they have, would spend it all on me.”
老己，是唯一一个笑着给我花钱的人，也是唯一一个身上有100块，就真的会给我花100块的人。
Related
Discussions in the Chinese media have focussed on explaining why it’s come about now. Saying it’s an emotional response to how many young people are feeling in China today.
It’s in contrast to other buzzwords we’ve discussed before in this newsletter, including phrases like “Buddhist-style” (佛系), “lying flat” (躺平), “small-town test taker” (小镇做题家), and “Kong Yiji literature” (孔乙己文学).
These phrases are reactions to difficulties people face in their lives, with a fatalism about their social reality and their inability to change it, as one analyst put it:
“These buzzwords point to a collective identity crisis among young people born in the 1990s and 2000s.
As they transition from school to the workforce, they are grappling with these existential questions:
Who am I? What is my place in society? How should I understand my relationship with this world?”
这些流行语所指向的，是一种带着集体意味的宏大焦虑。90后、00后们在离开校园，迈入社会的过程中，迷茫追问：我是谁？我在社会中处于什么位置？我该如何安放自己与这个世界的关系？
"Kudos to me" (爱你老己) is different: unlike those earlier slang terms, this one has a positive twist. It’s not complaining about the things people cant’t change; it’s emphasising self-care.
And it’s not the first phrase to lean into this sentiment, and is part of a recent trend of other similar self-care-based memes, including:
“Brave little lamb” (勇敢小羊) — celebrating small acts of independence and self-reliance as young people learn to take care of themselves
“This first cup, to myself” (第一杯，敬自己) — toasting and celebrating your own achievements first
“How about it, what can you do anyway” (如何呢，又能怎) — finding peace by accepting what you can’t control
The emergence of these new memes indicates how some young people are shifting their attention from external pressures, which they can’t change, to focussing on their own well-being, which is in their control. And they are rejecting the traditional view of:
‘You must excel [at work or in education] to be valued’ (你足够优秀，才值得被爱)
It’s a change in mindset of a generation which is learning to be comfortable in their own company, with their place in the world, and to take better care of themselves with no conditions attached, just:
“Kudos to me. See you tomorrow.”
爱你老己，明天见。
So, is this phrase here to stay? I think it probably it…
And that’s what we’re exploring this week!
Favourite Five
1. 自嬷 zì mó
self-deprecating self-mockery, self-ridicule (often aimed to evoke compassion)
它将恶意消解为无害的自嬷 - It melts away malice by turning it into harmless self-mockery. [1]
Note: relatively new internet slang
Related:
自嬷梗 zì mó gěng – self-mockery meme
小羊 xiǎo yáng – internet slang from the anime “Pleasant Goat and Big Big Wolf” that is used to provide self-encouragement; sometimes used to evoke compassion from others
娇牛马文学 jiāo niú mǎ wén xué – “delicate workhorse” literature
娇夫文学 jiāo fū wén xué – “delicate husband” literature, soft-male romance trope that flips the traditional narrative on its head
2. 富养 fù yǎng
to raise with abundance, to nurture generously
真正的“富养”，从来都不在于给小时候的自己补上多少玩具 - True “self-nurturing” has never been about making up for your childhood by buying all the toys you never had. [3]
Related:
养育 yǎng yù – to raise, to nurture
重养 chóng yǎng – to re-parent, to raise again
3. 安抚 ān fǔ
to soothe, to comfort emotionally
是安抚那个一点小事就被训斥，变得小心翼翼的自己 - It’s an act of comforting your inner child, who grew up timid and fearful after being constantly reprimanded for the smallest mistakes. [1]
Related:
安慰 ān wèi – to comfort, to console
4. 横空出世 héng kōng chū shì
to burst onto the scene, to emerge suddenly and dramatically
自从“爱你老己”横空出世，互联网上负能量减少80% - Ever since the “kudos to me” trend exploded, burst onto the scene, internet toxicity has dropped by 80%. [1]
5. 爱你老己 ài nǐ lǎo jǐ
love ya, my dear self; kudos to me
传统的社会规训告诉我们“你足够优秀，才值得被爱”，而年轻人们通过“爱你老己”这一新叙事暗示自己：因为我存在，所以我值得 - Traditional social norms say ‘you must be good enough to deserve love’, but young people are reinventing the narrative using phrases like “kudos to me” to remind themselves: I deserve to be loved for who I am. [2]
🎧RTM Podcast Preview
This week on the RTM Advanced podcast, we explain three confusing new internet slang phrases which you probably haven’t heard of before!.
自嬷 - self-deprecating self-mockery, self-ridicule (exaggerated, to win sympathy)
配得感 - sense of deserving, feeling worthy
爱你老己 - love ya, my dear self; kudos to me
Tune in at 7 minutes where we break down what they mean and the stories behind them…
How native speakers use them…
And how you can use them in real conversations right now and show off your amazing Chinese!
Consuming the Conversation
💡 Ready to get inspired to bridge the gap to real-world fluency? 💡
In every RTM Advanced post you unlock content and tools to inspire you, and help you get fluent.
So, ready to finally get started and wave goodbye to that nagging rusty feeling?
Let’s jump in👇
Consuming the Conversation
Useful words
6. 哄 hǒng
to coax, to soothe
可能有些人觉得这样哄自己显得很低幼 - Some people may feel that comforting yourself this way seems childish. [2]
7. 通病 tōng bìng
common problem, widespread issue
不懂得好好爱自己，似乎不只是我们这代人的“通病” - Not knowing how to properly love oneself seems to be a common issue across generations. [3]
8. 刷屏 shuā píng
to flood the feed, to go viral
最近又一个梗在刷屏，照片上是朴素的吃的 - Recently, my feeds are flooded with another meme which features photos of simple food. [1]
9. 善待 shàn dài
to treat kindly, to be kind to
我们在内耗中越陷越深，忘了自己才是最该被善待的那个人 - As we become increasingly trapped in internal anxiety, we forget that we are the ones who deserve kindness the most. [3]
10. 委屈 wěi qū
to wrong oneself, to suppress one’s feelings
开始懂得尊重自己的感受，不再委屈自己 - You start to honour your own feelings and stop compromising your own happiness for the sake of others. [3]
11. 撒娇 sā jiāo
to act cute, to act affectionately
自己和自己撒娇，自己劝自己睡觉 - You act cute with yourself and coax yourself to go to sleep. [1]
12. 粗粝 cū lì
rough, unpolished
这样的称呼有些粗粝，但实在 - Calling yourself this way doesn’t sound that polished, but it is honest. [2]
Three-character phrases
13. 无条件 wú tiáo jiàn
unconditional, without conditions
“爱你老己”更全面，更无条件 - “Kudos to me” represents the full and unconditional acceptance of oneself. [1]
